Friday, July 18, 2014

On Crying at Work

Is it allowed?

That's my first question. I've done it. It terrified everyone. But was it allowed? Is crying at work a total taboo? These are the types of things I tend not to be aware of until far, far too late.

But sometimes it happens. I have an extremely stressful job (par for the course of my life - I don't do "relaxed") and I work with some big personalities -  and I can say that because I am one of them. I love my job and the stakes are high. So when something goes off the handle it's stressful. And things go off the handle often as we're in the people business. Humans just don't always behave predictably - go figure.

So I cried once. I had a wee bit too much on my plate, I dropped the ball on a couple things, people got mad and I cried. And unfortunately I am in the type of office that everyone witnessed it and had to exist with the crying for a few minutes.

Sheryl Sandberg says it might be okay. I would personally say you shouldn't. But that's thing about crying, isn't it? You can't really look at yourself and think - this is definitely an inappropriate time to cry right now so STOP IT. Nope. That's not how it works.

Inevitably, those alligator tears get out anyway.

Why isn't it allowed? To some reasonable extent you are allowed to display elation, rage, despair... but to actually cry seems bad. But why is that? It's a physiological response to frustration, anger, sadness, etc. just like laughing to happiness (funniness?). Dare I say it's because crying is considered a "girl thing"? Regardless, I am not sure if crying in the workplace should be treated so sensitively as it is.

My approach was to cry a bit, terrify all the boys in the office, make things supremely awkward, leave the office, walk it off, come back and bump "Under Pressure."

I got a couple chuckles. And then I went home and had a beer. I felt better.

The I-cried-at-work face + Panacea








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